britomart_is ([personal profile] britomart_is) wrote2010-07-06 08:26 pm

Fic: Dictionary for a Dead Language; Epilogue

Master Post

Prologue | Chapter One | Chapter Two | Chapter Three | Epilogue



Epilogue.




There are two stocky, no-nonsense women drinking antique Coronas in the booth by the door when the kid walks in, making this officially their busiest night since opening.

"Dude," Dean says. "We're cool. We're like a happening spot. We're legitimate business owners."

Sam rolls his eyes and sips from a can of Tab they found in the back closet next to a bag of pork rinds with a pull-date from 1982. "Pillars of the community. Sure they'll give us the key to the city as soon as they're through with the paperwork." Dean punches Sam in the arm. Sam grins till his cheeks hurt.

The young man is standing in front of the bar, staring at Sam. Dean doesn't like it when people stare at Sam. Sam watches Dean's hand casually drifting to rest under the bar where the shotgun is. "I'd ask you for ID," Dean says mildly, "but I'm pretty sure you were a glimmer in the long-haul trucker's eye the last time anyone was issuing government ID. I can hook you up with a grape Fanta. It's a 1995, good vintage."

Sam wishes Dean wouldn't insult people's parentage, particularly since most people's parents are dead these days.

The kid visibly shakes his head as he snaps out of it. "Sorry. I came because I heard a rumor. Wow."

Dean stiffens. He doesn't like it when people hear whispers and come to try to shoot Sam in the back when he turns around to pour their drinks, either. Sam watches Dean's hand curling tighter around the shotgun and jostles him warningly with a knee. The kid's young, swimming in a coat three sizes too big for him, oughta be at some college party, or dragging all his laundry home over break to use his parents' washer. Sam leans over the bar, tries to look non-terrifying. "What can we help you with?"

"Actually, I've got something for you." When the kid reaches into his coat pocket, Sam's afraid Dean'll shoot him, but the kid produces a harmless scrap of paper. A photo. He hands it to Sam. "I thought you'd want this back."

By the time Sam breaks out of his trance, the kid's gone.

"What is it?" Dean asks suspiciously.

"I don't know," Sam says, handing the snapshot over. "I don't remember it."

Sam watches Dean take in the photo, bites his lip at the softening of Dean's facial expression. Dean looks up suddenly. "Where'd that guy get this?"

Sam shrugs. "Don't know. Glad he gave it back. I like it." Sam takes the picture back, lovingly straightening its dogeared edges. "We look happy."

Dean wraps his arms around Sam's waist from behind as Sam turns to face the back of the bar. "We're happy now."

Sam smiles broadly as he tucks the snapshot into the frame of the mirror that spans the wall behind dusty whiskey bottles. "There."

In the photograph, a garish monument looms with styrofoam solemnity in a grassy field. A man, young and momentarily untroubled, smiles bashfully. There's a sun in the sky, and a bird perched on the Welcome to Foamhenge sign. And there are two brothers, together.




the end

[identity profile] esnetsap.livejournal.com 2010-07-07 03:16 pm (UTC)(link)
baaawww. ok tbh i didn't expect it to end happily, i guess you started off angsty and slowly progressed towards the other end of the scale but ok w/e i like it a lot! thanks for writing this, it was beautiful and dean's voice is so..real.
ext_21612: (Default)

[identity profile] britomart-is.livejournal.com 2010-07-12 05:38 pm (UTC)(link)
Thank you, I'm so glad you enjoyed it! Lovely to hear that Dean's voice rings true.

[identity profile] canter76.livejournal.com 2010-07-07 03:19 pm (UTC)(link)
OMG.

Excellent
ext_21612: (Default)

[identity profile] britomart-is.livejournal.com 2010-07-12 05:42 pm (UTC)(link)
Thank you!

[identity profile] sn-143sn.livejournal.com 2010-07-07 03:25 pm (UTC)(link)
I think saying I loved this wouldnt be enough to express just how much I adored this fic &hearts
ext_21612: (sam :: boy king broody)

[identity profile] britomart-is.livejournal.com 2010-07-12 05:43 pm (UTC)(link)
♥♥

[identity profile] ataratah.livejournal.com 2010-07-07 03:29 pm (UTC)(link)
I totally was not expecting that twist with the journal. Nice job! I really enjoyed this.
ext_21612: (Default)

[identity profile] britomart-is.livejournal.com 2010-07-12 05:44 pm (UTC)(link)
Oooooh, sweet, it was a surprise! So glad you enjoyed it!

[identity profile] evildiorama.livejournal.com 2010-07-07 03:34 pm (UTC)(link)
This is one of the best BBs I've read so far.

God, just suckerpunch to the heart one right after the other.

Excellent.
ext_21612: (Default)

[identity profile] britomart-is.livejournal.com 2010-07-12 08:10 pm (UTC)(link)
Thank you, I'm flattered!

[identity profile] dev-earl.livejournal.com 2010-07-07 03:46 pm (UTC)(link)
YOU WIN. FOREVER.

I still love all the things I said I did, for sure, and I love the way you resolve the whole transitioning from being strangers to lovers issue. I thought it was a very awesome way of twisting it. Although it nearly killed me:

Dean's heart sinks. The duffel in that closet contains every journal the Winchesters ever kept, starting with John's and ending abruptly with the line Sam said yes. A complete chronicle of their histories: from the flesh-eaters in the theme park to the lost days in Cold Oak. Dean runs through every memory Sam's recounted and it all lines up with heartbreaking clarity. "What do you remember?"

AND!

Sam doesn't remember what their dad's voice sounds like. He doesn't remember that Mom loved him so much she died for him. He doesn't remember that Dean loved him so much he died for him.

AND! AND! This SLAYED me.

When Sam's not looking, the last five years of journals go into the blazing fireplace.

It's hard to convey how amazingly good this is so you'll just have to believe me that it is. I am completely in love with your Dean and that he chose this Sam over his brother was excruciating but it hurts so good and it rings true to Show as the kind of happy ending truly befitting the Winchesters.

I love you for finishing this and not knocking me over the head as I bugged you for it. Thank you so much for such an excellent read. ♥♥♥♥♥
ext_21612: (Default)

[identity profile] britomart-is.livejournal.com 2010-07-12 08:12 pm (UTC)(link)
I <3 yoooooooooouuuuuuuu. Thank you for everything, darling. THANK YOU FOR BUGGING ME. I have you to thank for this ever getting finished!

Wonderful Fic

[identity profile] katsunei.livejournal.com 2010-07-07 04:18 pm (UTC)(link)
This is one of the best fic I've read so far in this year's BB. I just really love your words and the post war world you've created. I love Dean's reaction to post Lucifer Sam. His struggle, his pain. I was just really moved.

One question though, I didn't quite understand the ending. Who's the boy and what meaning does the photo hold? I didn't quite get that part.

Re: Wonderful Fic

[identity profile] slashgoddess.livejournal.com 2010-07-07 04:53 pm (UTC)(link)
Go read Prologue.

[identity profile] tebtosca.livejournal.com 2010-07-07 05:18 pm (UTC)(link)
This was so UNBEARABLY beautiful and sad and hopeful and poetic and completely in character.

I loved every word! Gah.
ext_21612: (Default)

[identity profile] britomart-is.livejournal.com 2010-07-12 08:14 pm (UTC)(link)
Thank you! :D

[identity profile] silviakundera.livejournal.com 2010-07-07 05:26 pm (UTC)(link)
god, wow. This was both impossibly sad (what both men had been through; that Dean will never know the circumstances that lead Sam to yes; that the Sam who was is gone for good), and lovely, and strangely hopeful.

Just excellent.
ext_21612: (sam :: panic room mosaic)

[identity profile] britomart-is.livejournal.com 2010-07-12 08:16 pm (UTC)(link)
I'm so glad you enjoyed it! It's very nice to hear your thoughts on what made it work, so thank you for that!

[identity profile] slashgoddess.livejournal.com 2010-07-07 05:37 pm (UTC)(link)
So fucking worth my night.

[identity profile] auntshoe.livejournal.com 2010-07-07 05:41 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh God, I think I've cried my brains out( Thank you so much, I'm so sorry I don't have words to describe how brilliant and utterly amazing this fic is >< Thank you.
ext_21612: (sam :: mirrorface)

[identity profile] britomart-is.livejournal.com 2010-07-12 08:17 pm (UTC)(link)
Awww, thank you!

[identity profile] mickeym.livejournal.com 2010-07-07 05:43 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh, man. This is simultaneously just as good as I remember, and so much better. :)

I'm not sure if I can single out any one bit as a part that made me go "OHHH!" or as being spectacularly awesome, because I think the whole thing is spectacularly awesome. Okay, I lied. A run-down of some of my favorite bits of the story, in no particular order: The moment with Sam being all orgasmic over the dental floss was hysterical. When Dean gets a kitten for them. Dean with his head in Sam's lap, drunk, while Sam tells him he's not going to do anything he likes be alive, and being with Dean. The moment when Dean realizes Sam's dreaming/having nightmares. Dean telling Sam yes, he'd wanted this before.

I really liked how there were a couple of mirrored moments (and I have no idea if you did it intentionally, or it just happened that way), the way the narrative flowed, the words used: when Sam says yes, and there's that rush and jumble of words and thoughts, and then Sam hits the water., balanced against when Sam asks Dean if he wanted this (them) 'before', and Here at the end of the world, Dean hurls himself over the edge. "Yes."


I love the slow, gentle progression from Dean's hopelessness to "we're happy now" at the end. Because whatever went down that they may (or may not) be responsible for, they've suffered enough. They've made their penance, and they deserve to be happy, to be at peace.

The style you chose to write this in rocks so hard. It's conversational, and it sounds so like Dean -- a blend of the Dean we know, as well as the Dean from The End. I ached for him through the whole story, not only for what he's suffered/dealt with his whole life, but for his grieving his brother, wanting Sam to remember him. It hit hard when he realizes Sam doesn't actually remember stuff, that he'd read the journals so he could try to give Dean back the brother he lost. I ached for Sam then, too, because whatever he doesn't remember, the love he has for Dean -- a whole lifetime of it -- is still so obviously there. It's the cornerstone, the foundation, of who he is.

I really could go on and on about this. I adore this story ridiculous amounts, and I am beyond thrilled that you finished it :) That I got to see it along the way, in its various stages, makes me all kinds of happy. And the day/night we spent cheering each other on through never-ending emails while feverishly working to finish our first drafts? That's one of my fonder memories :) *hugs you tight*
ext_21612: (duos :: mama's boy)

[identity profile] britomart-is.livejournal.com 2010-07-12 08:31 pm (UTC)(link)
You're making me MIST UP here, dude. You handheld me through the whole writing of this and you still have energy to spare to analyze? Impressive. :D

I feel like you have an advantage from knowing me so well! You don't have to be too nervous, because you know that even if I'm starting from somewhere really dark, I don't really want to go to a place of "And no progress was possible, everything sucked without the slightest glimmer of hope, and they were sad forever and ever. THE END."

One of my fonder memories, too! I'm gonna save that email thread FOREVER.

[identity profile] kuhekabir.livejournal.com 2010-07-07 06:06 pm (UTC)(link)
excellent story, very poetic. Thanks for sharing :)
ext_21612: (jared :: dimple)

[identity profile] britomart-is.livejournal.com 2010-07-12 08:31 pm (UTC)(link)
Thank you!

Dictionary for a Dead Language

[identity profile] ewanmax.livejournal.com 2010-07-07 06:37 pm (UTC)(link)
Very interesting and painful and addicting and I didn't want it to end. Thank you for a tremendous read.
ext_21612: (Default)

Re: Dictionary for a Dead Language

[identity profile] britomart-is.livejournal.com 2010-07-12 08:32 pm (UTC)(link)
Thank you, so happy to hear you enjoyed it!

[identity profile] tigerlilytoo.livejournal.com 2010-07-07 06:37 pm (UTC)(link)
Human life is short and painful and flickers out without fanfare, and that will never change. And it's worth it. Sam remembers now.

I started crying there, and didn't stop.

This is so beautiful. The theme of choices made -- that change everything and can't be taken back -- is heartbreaking.

Wonderful story, beautifully written.
ext_21612: (samanddean :: enough tuesdays)

[identity profile] britomart-is.livejournal.com 2010-07-12 08:33 pm (UTC)(link)
*hug* Thank you so much for taking the time to let me know! It means a lot to hear that it affected you!

[identity profile] aldehyde.livejournal.com 2010-07-07 06:56 pm (UTC)(link)
aaah, i love this fic SO much. you had me crying during EVERY chapter. so many beautiful descriptions and heartbreaking lines of dialogue. and the ending! this is perfect. thanks so much for sharing.
ext_21612: (samanddean :: brothertouching [lucifer])

[identity profile] britomart-is.livejournal.com 2010-07-12 08:47 pm (UTC)(link)
Thrilled to hear it! It's really nice to hear your reaction, thank you for the feedback!

[identity profile] rasah.livejournal.com 2010-07-07 08:16 pm (UTC)(link)
That was absolutely beautiful. And made me cry. Really evocatively and beautifully written, thanks for sharing :o)
ext_21612: (Default)

[identity profile] britomart-is.livejournal.com 2010-07-12 08:47 pm (UTC)(link)
Thank you so much!
(deleted comment)
ext_21612: (characters :: badass mary)

[identity profile] britomart-is.livejournal.com 2010-07-13 05:46 pm (UTC)(link)
*beams* Thank you!

[identity profile] viciousbluesky.livejournal.com 2010-07-07 08:51 pm (UTC)(link)
This was so brilliant! I ESPECIALLY loved the ending, with the picture the kid had from the beginning of the fic. It made my heart swell. And just...the whole thing. I loved it. Fantastic job!
ext_21612: (Default)

[identity profile] britomart-is.livejournal.com 2010-07-13 05:46 pm (UTC)(link)
Thank you, I'm so glad the symmetry worked for you! That's lovely to hear!

[identity profile] makeit-takeit.livejournal.com 2010-07-07 09:50 pm (UTC)(link)
This was fantastic! Dean's voice was spot on, and I loved the slow build and the development of Sam, and their relationship. Really beautiful <3
ext_21612: (Default)

[identity profile] britomart-is.livejournal.com 2010-07-13 05:47 pm (UTC)(link)
Thank you! <3

[identity profile] inmyredshoes.livejournal.com 2010-07-07 10:29 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh so beautiful. Really well done. Very painful to read at first, but still very lovely.
ext_21612: (Default)

[identity profile] britomart-is.livejournal.com 2010-07-13 05:47 pm (UTC)(link)
Thank you! Glad you made it through the angsty bits. :)

[identity profile] allydenise.livejournal.com 2010-07-07 11:03 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh my Lord, this was just so bloody amazing that I'm sort of in a daze here.

I lost count of how many times my heart was broken during this. Everything so visual and alive and just punching a hole into my chest and bruising my insides.

Crikey O'Reilly, what a completely awe inspiring writer you are.

I need a stiff brandy, a wet cloth for my tear red eyes and a lay down in a quiet room now!

Loves this so much. <3

ext_21612: (porn :: making out)

[identity profile] britomart-is.livejournal.com 2010-07-13 05:49 pm (UTC)(link)
Thank you, what a lovely comment! Just what a writer hopes to hear, you know?
ext_7850: by ev_vy (Default)

[identity profile] giandujakiss.livejournal.com 2010-07-07 11:11 pm (UTC)(link)
Wow. Really all I've got to say. Wow.

[identity profile] harrigan.livejournal.com 2010-07-07 11:44 pm (UTC)(link)
*is verklempt*

[identity profile] mystik-ivanow.livejournal.com 2010-07-08 01:01 am (UTC)(link)
Awesome, awesome, awesome, awesoooome story.


*both thumbs up*
ext_21612: (Default)

[identity profile] britomart-is.livejournal.com 2010-07-13 05:50 pm (UTC)(link)
So glad you enjoyed it!

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